My view of the series of events - as someone who was present for both conversations - is that an explicit singular “fuck off” in response to activity that has directly resulted in people leaving the project shouldn’t result in an immediate muting when the same actions are permitted as long as they are worded politely (nice words do not always represent nice sentiments).
Delroth’s response in this instance might have been impolite. But when (either through malintent or genuine ignorance, it doesn’t matter) driving away minority participation by (baselessly) classifying representation as discriminatory in threads like this is ok because they are written “civilly”, the only real difference is that one of them was direct and to the point.
This highlights a serious issue with our uneven code of conduct application. If any of the long threads on Discourse and GitHub where exclusion of minoritised groups is argued for through the proxy of “fairness” and vague allegations of “discrimination” aren’t treated as bad faith concern trolling that lead to even temporary suspensions - neither should a simple “fuck off” from someone tired of their peers being pushed out of the project. Both are explicitly called out in the code of conduct as unacceptable behaviour, but the decision to only act on one is tacit approval of exclusionary sentiments.