I would say that PRs are self-contained. Context from previous events are relevant to the individuals, but might not be relevant to the larger discussion in context of the PR; there’s no reason to continue animosity when a conversation could have occurred.
My main push in the matter is this growing divide has apparently been growing over the course of months; and the recent PR is just the most recent “release” of this tension. I just want to prevent a scenario where all involved parties just part ways with nixpkgs suddenly, and the community is smaller for it.
Nixpkgs also has a lack of previous inter-personal issues, and it’s something I don’t think the community is really prepared for. However, I think the discussion around such events is healthy; I will also recognize that it’s a terrible experience for all parties involved.
This seems similar to a workplace dispute. You don’t have to agree with your co-workers, you don’t need to even like your co-workers; but in context of work, you should still consider their opinion in good faith, unless proven otherwise. I see a lot of people perceiving offenses, but I don’t see a lot of deliberate malice by SS2K. However there was name-calling, public embarrassment, and use of “harassment” by others. Such language does escalate the situation from a misunderstanding to inflammatory.
We are all different, and should accept people for being different. SS2K uses a lot of terse language. This may be perceived as “giving an order” or dismissive, but I don’t think that was his intention. We all say things which may not reflect how we truly feel, and can be construed to mean something else (e.g. “I am lazy”). But that’s not really fair.
Most of his comments about “I don’t care” are usually in the context of code, and “I” will give them equal treatment to code. I don’t see him being intentionally exclusionary; but rather the opposite, just poorly worded.
Also, English is not the first language for many contributors, which further compounds poor delivery of communication.