I definitely see the need to have these discussions, see also NixOS Foundation Event Sponsorship Policy - #4 by cafkafk happening just now.
And actually, the Discourse is probably the best place to do this overall. (The moderation team even recently made a policy to move all moderation meta discussions over to Discourse because they were completely overboarding on Matrix)
In my eyes, this is not an issue of where, but one of how. How can we have these discussions without them turning into mud wars every single time? (there is a track record) And I don’t think that moving them elsewhere yet again will magically fix this. This is a social issue in our community, and one that runs deep.